Does your sex life need sprucing up? Here are 11 NSFW hot tips from our sexy sex expert.

You’re great in the sack: You pay attention to her desires, you’re enthusiastic, and you can even write the alphabet with your tongue. But there are just certain places you (and many other lesbians) just won’t go.

Why? Because that dildo looks too real and BDSM is strictly for the kinky? Well, a “penis” does wonders when strapped onto a lady, everyone deserves a good spanking sometimes, and, no offence, but we can all write the alphabet with our tongues.

So don’t be shy. These lesbian sex taboos could be exactly what’ll take you from “great” to over-the-edge amazing.

1. Get Real(istic). There are perks to veering away from typical candy-pink dildos and more toward the realistic. Vix-Skin, an exclusive-to-Vixen-Creations blend of silicone, makes for the most realistic-feeling (and, yes,-looking) dildos ever.

Sure, they’re “flesh-coloured,” but this body-heat-transmitting, dual-density silicone makes for a high-performing rigid inner core and a supple-soft outer cushion that’ll guarantee neither of you will be thinking about the “real deal” (unless you want to, of course).

2. Pack It. Though it is nothing new to those who pack regularly, women who confine masculine gender play to the bedroom should give public packing a try. Packing is when someone puts a little extra somethin’ down her pants (usually a soft, dildo-esque toy intended for an aesthetic bulge rather than penetration) as a means of gender expression.

Wear one to the club or even the grocery store. Letting her know you’re packing a little extra heat will have her begging you to take her home.

3. Explore the Backdoor. Just because we ladies don’t have a posterior pleasure spot like the male prostate doesn’t mean anal sex is restricted to our Cher-loving counterparts. Read up on it in Tristan Taormino’s Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women to shed those pesky fears that backdoor shenanigans are dirty or painful (with patience, a good lube, and a regular shower, this just isn’t true) and start embracing the pleasurable pressure that can come (and come) with our booties.

Before you start sizing up your regular strap-on, check out smaller, more manageable toys like Good Vibrations’ vibrating Pandora Plug, designed to stay put during other activities, or Romeo beads, which will kick up your orgasm when removed during climax.

4. Twice the Fun! Once practice has made perfect, double your pleasure with the Menage-a-Trois harness, featuring two rings for two separate dildos. It’ll let your sweetie experience the risqué fantasy of a threesome without (you dyke-drama-tists) making things even more complicated with your ex.

5. Put a Ring on It. You wish I were talking about Beyoncé. I’m talking about cock rings. Yes, they need renaming, but the vibrating versions of these little devils will make you realize that the cocks aren’t the only ones in the coop getting a boost here. Strategically position these adjustable, vibrating rings over a dildo or fingers, keeping your other hand free to roam. Fan-favourite Neptune Ring’s separate battery pack puts her in control of vibration intensity.

6. Watch Porn. Not the soft-kissing, tame lesbian porn of the ’90s. We’re much hotter than that. Those familiar with the modern dyke porn scene may already know the super-hot butch-on-butch and femme-loving flicks by Pink and White Productions—like the notorious Crash Pad Series. Other lesbolicious titles like One Night Stand,  or those directed by Joanna Angel and specializing in alternative porn between the young and tattooed in all kinds of positions, queer and straight.

And don’t shy away from wham-bam-thank-you hetero porn! Getting off on watching an innocent cheerleader get seduced by a cute delivery boy does not make you a bad lesbian. It just makes you comfortable with your sexuality. And that’s just hot.

7. Talk Dirty. Getting called a few choice words (and liking it) isn’t as anti-feminist as your college professor may have suggested. If it turns you on to play with consensual degradation, or if you just plain want to narrate, do it! Tongue-tied? Warm-up by reading erotica to each other. The queer publishing company Cleis Press puts out a steamy Best Lesbian Erotica collection yearly.

8. Blow Her Away. Yes, the Mr Man dildo looks realistic, but it also features a hollow core, which, when strapped onto the right spot, allows you to actually feel the sensation when someone sucks on the toy. Though it doesn’t pack or penetrate very well (and can be a little awkward to get situated), it certainly makes for some great roleplaying opportunities.

9. Back Off. Everyone knows that U-Hauling lesbos love it up-close and personal, but a little space (and technology) can go a long way in foreplay. Hook her up with Love to Love’s Cry-Baby, a remote-controlled vibrator that lets you direct her through seven pulse patterns wherever you are (well, within 30 feet). Make that date night a little more interesting or torture her from the next room.
Farther than 30 feet away? Bridge the gap with OhMiBod’s Better Than Chocolate vibe, which plugs into your computer for some Skype-compatible fun and puts a whole new spin on the concept of dirty talk.

10. Get Knotty. BDSM (bondage/dominance and sadism/masochism) isn’t all savage whippings in dark dungeons. Rather, a little consensual power play involving the giving and relinquishing of dominance and submission can be very sexy indeed.

Make a smooth introduction to the scene with Incoqnito’s line of discretely sophisticated BDSM toys like its leather-and-stainless-steel cuffs and wearable Droplet Necklace (above), nipple clamps that double as subtle vibrators.

11. Pick Up the Third Wheel. When done right, threesomes can bring daring couples closer together or make for an unforgettable one-night stand. Plus, going on the prowl with your honey is lots of fun