Should I Text My Ex?
Should I? Shouldn't I? The question we have all asked ourselves at some point.
Instagram Candice Wilson @cw077
Well, this could be the world's shortest post ever.
In a word, “NO”.
In two words, “Eff NO!”
In three words, “Don’t get crazy!”
In five words, “Step away from your phone.”
Usually when we ask the question, “Should I text my ex?,” it’s not because we don’t know the answer, but rather, we're looking for permission. We want someone to say it’s OK to scratch that itch, when we know we really shouldn’t.
Having periods of sentimental feelings about an ex is natural; something we all experience it from time to time. When we reflect on the relationship after it, we often reflect on the good parts. We think about how great she was; that one vacation; how she used to touch your face... You may even get into bed with a tub of ice cream and cry it out 6 months after the break up.
Here’s the thing, though: However intense this moment, it will pass. It’s an emotional one, and not a logical one, and it will pass. As soon as your head takes over again, you will remember how she messed up on an Ashley Madison level; the million reasons you broke up in the first place; and why told your friends, “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together." So, sit tight ladies. This sentimental moment will pass, I promise you.
*How to stop a friend in danger of texting an ex*
We don’t always get the closure we want in relationships. Sometimes, they end abruptly and bruise our egos and break our hearts. All the responses in the world you are going to receive after sending out an unsolicited, “Hey, I miss you” text are NOT, I REPEAT NOT going to make you feel any better. If the asshole you broke up with didn’t care enough to take the time to give you closure, they aren’t going to now. It’s the law of asshole physics.
The other law in asshole physics you should know is this one: Any attempt you make to get closure from an asshole will only result in you feeling worse afterwards. Trust me on this. You’ll feel a lot better about yourself if you stay strong and stick to your guns. At the end of the day, most of us don’t actually want our assholes back. We just want validation, maybe an explanation, and to have the other person honour a connection we once felt deeply.
However, ladies, as with so many things in life, this mutha is an inside job. It’s all stuff we have to figure out on our own. Letting go is a ONE woman job. So forget texting that ex and REPLY to that smokeshow tanned bae DM’ing you those bikini selfies.
Natash is the Founder and Editor-in-chief of Effort-Lez, a lesbian lifestyle blog.