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April Online Horoscope 2017

April showers for May flowers will only add to the wet mess of planetary activity through the autumn. So get wet but don’t drown.


Aries (March 21-April 20)
Your imagination can run amok, leading to jealousy, recrimination and foolhardy delusions. Hey it sounds like a party, Aries! Or at least a passion play... and we know how that ended up. Let your heart loose, let it soar and let it embrace the craziness. It could be fun and life changing. But be sure to enter any affair with your eyes totally open and focused.


Taurus (April 21-May 21)
Gal pals want to not only get into your personal business they also decide that they know what is best for you. That might be true, Taurus, as you may be extra dreamy and impractical now. But take the risk to choose, even if your choice is silly. Who knows what can happen when some silly fling turns into something much more? Maybe your bosom buddies are just a little jealous…


Gemini (May 22-June 21)
As you claw your way to the top of the corporate heap, you may find that what you took for granted is not much of a sure thing anymore. The chess board of political intrigue has changed while you looked away and partied on. Get back to the strategic fight, Gemini, and show the sharks that you are fishing with shark bait… and firing up the BBQ.


Cancer (June 22-July 23)
An adventure is in the making. Your world view becomes more global and maybe even a bit off kilter. Better stop following the fake news, Cancer, and get the real story by seeing it up close for yourself. Explore the corners of the world with company. Girlfriends are ready for anything and everything. How many of them can you pack into your itinerary? Maybe they will pack you.


Leo (July 24-Aug 23)
There will be sexual high jinx aplenty this autumn as your heart cannot be tied down and knows no bounds. (Unless tying up is your thing…?) Lionesses whose eyes are too big for their appetite may find that their balancing act between a choice of lovergrrls spills over into other parts of their life. How messy and complicated do you like it? Oh be careful of what you wish!


Virgo (Aug 24-Sept 23)
Certain relationships may undergo a dramatic, unexpected change. Have you been too attentive (to the point of obsession) or not attentive enough with partners, Virgo? Try to maintain your balance while the scales tip. Or forget common sense and give yourself up to the fates. See which tight package is delivered to your love nest. Will she be C.O.D., fragile or time sensitive?


Libra (Sept 24-Oct 23)
Try not to overdo or expose yourself to too much stress now. You may find that life becomes too much of a whirlwind and moves slightly out of control. But this may also be a time of consolidation, good decision-making and goal achievement? Of course we are talking about luscious Libra so expect (and hope for) more exposure. Nothing exceeds like excess!


Scorpio (Oct 24-Nov 22)
Party on, Scorpio! Not only will you find yourself invited to all of the selective hot spots, you become a bit of a hot spot yourself. Ladies want to get to know you better and you get to know some of them better too. Decorate yourself with an array of arm candy and see who tempts your sweet tooth. You may even develop a few cavities… if you are lucky.  


Sagittarius (Nov 23-Dec 22)
Although it might be nice to get closer to certain family members, try to draw clear boundaries with them. Relationships can be improved but there will be a point of diminishing returns and maybe even a frustrating surprise or two. Sagittarians with a yen to connect are better off spreading their personal oil on lovergrrls who will be there when you start to slide around.


Capricorn (Dec 23-Jan 20)
Something light that you might say off the cuff can ignite a raging fire now, Capricorn. Are you ready to rumble? If not, then say what you mean and mean what you say, but say it very diplomatically. In fact, try to make your actions speak louder and prouder than your words. When in doubt, just let your hands to the talking. Will there be roaming charges…?


Aquarius (Jan 21-Feb 19)
​Aqueerians may want to splurge on a certain, special lovely but I suggest a little bit of caution now. Your generous heart knows no bounds and you may be wasting your money as well as your time. But if you don’t mind being taken for a ride, go ahead and take a calculated risk. Who knows? It could be a quick but exciting joyride.


Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
You are not only in the epicenter of everyone’s attention; you will find that anything you do or say will ripple quickly through the social swirl. So plan on your next big move and very carefully go forward with your plans. Expect a few surprises along the way. Even your missteps can be charming, depending on which Miss you step on. Ouch!



© 2017, Charlene Lichtenstein, All rights Reserved, For Entertainment Purposes Only
Contact her via her blog: www.TheStarryEye.typepad.com
Author: “HerScopes: A Guide to Astrology for Lesbians” (Simon & Schuster)




Taurus (April 21-May 21)
Amazon Bulls are perhaps one of the best money managers of the zodiac. If you have some funds to invest, consult a this sapphic woman. She will not put your life savings in derivatives or other crazy high risk money schemes. More than likely, she will carefully place your nest egg in a conservative money market or annuity. It may not triple in a year, but you are practically guaranteed to feast on fluffy omelettes in your old age.


Gemini (May 22-June 21)
Lesbian Twins are the earn and burn types when it comes to finances. She is far more interested in the excitement of money and what it can buy rather than its long term power and ease. She is also rather generous with her possessions. For these reasons she is apt to squander her payload as fast as she can grab it. Save for a rainy day? Forgetaboutit sister!


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